Tops or Bottoms
Tops or Bottoms
“The Renaissance Is My Favorite Historical Period.”
He was 46 years-old when he began writing plays. He never took a playwriting class. He just committed to sitting his butt down at desk for at least four hours a day. He listened to music when he wrote. It was his habit to listen to the same CD over and over. When he wrote Tops or Bottoms in 2002 he listened to Benny Goodman.
It took him a year to write the play. That’s a lot of Benny Goodman. In particular that’s a lot of “Sing, Sing, Sing.” A dose that heavy would probably drive most people mad. He claims it didn’t drive him mad.
He can’t prove it.
The inspiration for Tops or Bottoms was a comment he overheard at a Starbucks. Two mid-40ish women were talking. One proudly said to the other, “We never have sex and we’re very happy.”
Is that possible? Does her husband agree with her? When push comes to shove, does she really believe it? Maybe they do.
This was worthy of exploration. Which for him meant writing a play. Edward Albee wrote plays in his head. Often walking on beaches. Once the play was finished — which could take years — he put them to paper, writing very quickly.
Try writing quickly with Benny Goodman assaulting you.
Tops or Bottoms is about Robin and Jack Simon, recent empty nesters. Robin thinks she might be pregnant and neither she nor Jack can remember the last time they had sex.
What follows is an excerpt. To generate seat of the pants suspense, let’s call it, “The Renaissance Is My Favorite Historical Period.”
If you want to hear the whole play, just click on this link. If you don’t, keep it to yourself.
Tops or Bottoms Original Cast Recording »
Some Housekeeping.
Almost all of you were not Substack subscribers or followers until we shoved, Do You Know This Man? down your figurative throats. Yes, Substack is a neologism. Why sub? Why stack? Why combine them? No reason.
We’ve heard from many of you that the word “subscribe” is perplexing. I’m getting this for free; yet I’m subscribing. This is oxymoronish. We think Substack should fix this. Do they care what we think? No.
We are pretty sure this “subscriber” problem is preventing most of you from recommending Do You Know This Man? to your friends, family and colleagues. The workaround is simple. Tell them subscribe means free. But it really doesn’t does it? You figure out the workaround.
What’s in it for us? Wrong question. Right question? What’s in it for you? Altruism.
The comment section.
It’s about time we got the conversational ball rolling. Here are some trigger talk questions.
Is the new season of The Bear as good as seasons one and two?
Are we already an authoritarian nation and just don’t know it?
Should Substack rename itself?
Pet Peeves?
Happy 4th! Really enjoy it. It could be your last if Project 2025 prevails.
Do You Know This Man?: An Irreverent Memoir is an ongoing exploration of the one character who eludes, confounds and mystifies. Me. Right now, it’s available for free, including being able to listen to some of my plays and dive into the best of Sportscape Magazine.
Current premium content available for free:
Listen to the original cast recordings of Persistence of Vision and Tops or Bottoms.
Watch a complete performance of Botanic Garden.
That’s the scoop!